As hard as it is for me to believe it, my first semester of seminary is over! My summer break has started! I celebrated the end of the semester after my final earlier tonight with a frozen strawberry lemonade and a new episode of Grey’s Anatomy. In a few minutes when Grey’s is over I will be heading to bed since tomorrow I am working all day. Way to start break with a bang right? Hopefully more blogging soon. For now it’s good night!
So as of late I have been struggling a lot with where I am at in my life. It all started as I transitioned from college, living in BG, having some amazing friends, and being connected to a wonderful body of believers at LHBC to living in Lville, being a Master’s student, not having a church, or a friend group.
As I made this transition I hit a low place in my walk with Christ. I stopped having a quiet time, I stopped opening the Word, stopped praying, and didn’t really want to do any of those things. I was going to different churches trying to find one to call “home” but believing that I would never find one that could be seen as a home. I missed LHBC, the people and the ability I had to serve there and that is where I wanted to be. I had become very close-minded.
Not only had I become close minded towards churches, but also people. I didn’t think there could be people that cared about me like the ones I had left in BG. I didn’t think that there were friends to be had and I didn’t really make an effort to make any.
Needless to say my close-mindedness had made my life a huge struggle from day one of living in Lville. So where am I now?
Well, life is still a struggle, but I have learned and seen that God is still sovereign and in control. He has put me at an amazing church, among amazing people, and really blessed me and opened my eyes to see that I do have a “home” in Lville. I have been so thankful for the community at Springdale. If it wasn’t for the people there and the Lord so noticeably moving in that place I would probably still be stuck in my close-minded mess. This doesn’t mean that everything is hunky dory and I am always the best person and in the best mood, but it does mean that I am human and that I am moving towards being closer to God like I once was.
I have still had trouble finding a friend group, but have met some pretty awesome people that are beginning to fill this role. Thankfully. I am so ready to have the community I once had, because life without it has been super hard.
One a slightly different note – another reason Lville has been such a struggle has been my work situation. The family I work for seemed great at first but as I got into things this was not the case at all. They are good people, but they are not the fit for me. I love their children, but cannot continue working with them. So this coming Friday will be my last day as thier nanny.
Another struggle of Lville has been my class schedule. I really like one of my classes, another one has huge potential, and the other I thought I would like, but is way harder than I expected and I just do not like it. It might be the basis of me changing my degree.
Hopefully things in my life will continue to get better, getting involved at Springdale is just the tip of the iceberg for what the Lord has for me I feel. I am working on getting my quiet time back on track, hoping to get involved more in a small group of believers to hold me accountable and to live life with, and hopefully I will find another job soon, because if not then my life will be another set of worries and struggles.
Well that is my rant and dumping of how I feel right now. This is what I am doing instead of working on my Systematic Theology Paper that is due Tuesday.
So today is a day of Firsts for me: First day of February, First day of Seminary classes, First Seminary book finished, First day of Greek, First day of being a full time student and a full time employee. Sounds like a great day doesn’t it!